Saturday, October 28, 2006

I'm Sorry I'm Fat.

I'm sorry I'm fat.

I really am, I'm sorry that my fat offends you and you don't want to hire me or be seen with me.
I'm sorry that I wrecked my back. I'm sorry that I had been a body-builder and didn't realize that because I'd wrecked my back that I should have stopped eating like one. I thought I would be okay and that I would bounce back from my injury, but I didn't and I got fat. I'm sorry I'm fat.

I'm sorry I don't have time to cook healthier food. When I hurt my back I lost my job and I racked up a lot of debt. When you have no money you find that food that's bad for you is cheaper than food that's good for you is. Not all of it, but most of it. I payed off my debts, but because I'm fat I still offend people. I'm sorry. I could have made more money but I stayed at my job because I believed my boss when he told me that I would someday be rewarded, so at the age of 35 , I was making $9.50 an hour, even though I would have been paid $25 an hour anywhere else. My reward was a damaged back and a pink slip. I'm sorry I trusted my boss, I will never make that mistake again. I don't trust anybody any more.

I'm sorry I didn't become an alcoholic or a drug addict instead of being fat. People feel sorry for those people, they make excuses for the behavior of those people. They talk about broken families, hard times, lost jobs and pain and say that the alcoholic and the drug addict must be excused for their problems. I used food instead of drugs or booze but people hate me. They don't make excuses for me because I offend them. I wonder why? Unlike alcoholics, I can drive safely. Unlike drug addicts, I've never stolen anything to fence for a cheeseburger. Unlike either one, I've never hurt other people yet I'm the one who offends most people.

Some day I will be thin again. I will be invisible. I plan to return the cruelty I've been shown these last few years by my fellow man. I'm not going to run around with a chainsaw or a high powered rifle, I'm simply going to show the same understanding an compassion I've received.

Then you'll be sorry.

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